57 Years of Journaling Day 3

I've been journaling for over 57 years! I started writing in 1962, just before John F. Kennedy was assassinated.  I have all these journals in notebooks dated and many pages numbered.  I'm sure writing in them helped me heal a lot but what do I do with them now?  

I was so sure I was going to shred them and it felt good.  But I had 2nd thoughts.  My son and Granddaughter said they wanted to read them but there are over 15 filled notebooks.  When would they have time?  Are they that interesting?  I wish my mother, aunt or grandmother had written journals and passed them on to me.

I was quite agoraphobic back then and wouldn't eat in restaurants or travel.  I had panic attacks trying to go to church or meetings.  I got somewhat better but much of my pain is on these pages.  During one of my astrology readings,  it was suggested I get rid of these journals so I could release the energy of my past. 

Why am I still holding on? What do I think will happen if I get rid of them? The free shredding truck will be at the park soon. 

Do I think I'm going to write my memoir? Do I need to know what I ate for dinner January 28 1971? 

If there are any other long time journal writers reading this, I'd love to hear your opinions.


Ellie-TheForgottenMuse said...

I have journaled on and off since I was twelve when I got my first diary. A gift from my uncle's girl friend.
Much of my past writing is lost through no fault of my own, but that's another story. Sometimes, I wish I had my old writing just to see what I was thinking back then. What was I going through at that moment.
I think it's good to keep them, read them and see how far you've come, grown, and changed over the years.
I wish my mother or grandmothers had journals that I could have read. Maybe it would have been an insight into them that would have helped me understand them.
For me, I don't know if I could do it. I don't know if I could be the one to destroy them. I know there are people that destroy them as a releasing ceremony. But for me, the writing is the release and proof that I survived. But then again, I have a hard time of getting rid of things :)

JaymeTHunt.com said...

I think that journalling is so personal and it's a great gift to yourself as well as to others. Think of what the world would be like if Anne Frank had destroyed her journal/diary! We would be so much poorer, as a human race, now.

When I started journalling, it was to capture the things I was observing around me - but I did do some venting in them. I even wrote notes to each of the people I figure will read them later. I keep mine in a ziplock bag in a drawer. I have no intentions of getting rid of them because I think the world (and, in particular, my family) would be so much poorer without them in the future.

Would you destroy your blog because an astrologer suggested it would be a healing activity? I would hope not! I might not be able to grow as fast without your words. I might feel like I'm the only one to experience something. But WITH your words, out there in the universe, you're giving the gift of Belonging to someone. Maybe someone you know. Maybe a complete stranger, like myself. I awoke this morning thinking about the spindles (from a previous post) and wondering how I am going to use that wisdom.

Cheryl, the jungian Knitter said...

I have been keeping a journal since 1974. Now and then I read an old volume but mostly they gather dust. I go round and round about what to do with them. No answer yet.

Was Smiling Now and Forever said...

I wouldn't let them go. That could be valuable information for family members. Stuff that might not have been said. Maybe they will be there treasure one day. Dont forget the past it is a reminder of how far you have come! It looks like you have come a very long way! Kudos!!!

Lea said...

I haven't journaled for years or anything like what you've done, however, if my mother had, I would treasure each page she had written. I would keep them and pass them along to your family members. I think they would be an awesome gift for grandkids.