Thursday, March 12, 2009

Agoraphobia and Astrology

Last time I talked about being agoraphobic for 30 years. In case you don't know what Agoraphobia is, it is fear of the marketplace. I started and facilitated Agoraphobics Anonymous in Palm Beach County in the middle 70s. We had speakers come in to talk to us and we learned that agoraphobia is the fear of having a panic attack. We learned that those of us who had these fears had a lot of "what if" thoughts. "what if I have a panic attack and lose control and make a fool out of myself?" "What if I get too scared and can't drive home?" On and on these what if thoughts would fly through our minds, scaring us. We learned how to change these thoughts and now that I look back, a lot of this relates to the Law of Attraction. What does Abraham tell us about thinking? He says to find a better thought. In our therapy sessions we were taught cognitive thinking - how to change the what if thoughts to more positive ones. We were taught to focus on something besides how we felt or what "might" happen, even if we had to start counting backwards from 100. Just don't think the worst thoughts.

Ever since the 1950s I was studying affirmations and going to classes about positive thinking. I also went to the mental health center for hypnosis. All these helped me, but it wasn't until I got my first astrology reading that things began to click. Since I have my sun and moon in fixed signs and opposite each other, it helped me understand myself better. My sun is in Taurus and my moon is in Scorpio, basically opposite each other. My astrologer told me one of the things I was here to learn about was balance. How true that is! I used to not be able to eat one cookie, I'd have to eat the whole box. I used to smoke but never just one cigarette after dinner like my husband could do, I was up to 3 packs a day when I finally was able to quit. Some days I flat out didn't want to be married and wanted to run away and other days I was perfectly happy being the "housewife and mother." I learned that because I had my moon and sun in fixed signs it was a bit harder for me to let go of things than it would be for people who had mutable or air signs. However I am very thankful for my Sagittarius rising sign. It is helpful to have at least one fire sign to help me release.

My Saturn is in my 3rd house in Pisces and right now Uranus is there giving me a chance to blow that
Saturn out of the water and help me communicate more easily and even become more psychic. I'm excited about this.

So my introduction to Astrology through understanding my own chart has helped me so much to get over being agoraphobic. Oh I still have my moments but now I have many tools to use if and when I get anxious. One thing is I'll never tell someone "just get over it," because it isn't that easy. I've learned compassion, patience and yes things could have been easier but hey I have more empathy and understanding about people and their problems than I would have if I hadn't had my own stuff to work through. Am I finished? Ha ha, I'm not dead yet!

1 comment:

Vinod Kumar Saini said...
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