Blogging Day 10 Sad Movie Brought Up A Lot of Thoughts

I just finished watching one of the saddest movies ever.
This was free on Roku today. My husband had seen it before but I hadn't so we watched it together.

The movie was 

with Richard Gere.   Such a love story between a man and his dog.  No, the dog doesn't die. I don't want to give the plot away but when Richard dies the dog sits at the train station and waits for him to get off the train and come home.  Spring, summer, fall, winter Hachi sits.  As the tears streamed down my face and I stifle back sobs I think about this love and loyalty.  

Here is a preview: 

Yes it is hard to lose someone you love, grief is such an all encompassing emotion but we cannot explain death to animals.  They must feel so abandoned.  Yes people feel abandoned too.  I know I did when my daddy died.   So empty, so bereft.  I remember going into is closet, smelling his clothes and sobbing.   I remember a few years ago going to pay my respects to some friends who lost their mother and seeing the father sitting beside the casket, their dog sitting beside him.  Such an emotional picture, so poignant. I had to hold back my sobs until I got back to the car.

Children don't  understand death so do they wait and wait for their parent to come home?  How does one explain this to a child?  What about someone who is mentally impaired.  Can they understand? Would they sit by a door and wait?

We've seen videos about dogs who greet their owners who have been deployed for years.  

A friend told me that after her mother got dementia she would forget that her husband had died and would ask where is he? My friend reminded her that he'd died.  She realized that her mother had to grieve all over again each time, so she stopped saying he'd died and said he was out fishing or doing something else.

Yes this is a tear jerker, I admit.  Life can feel so empty when someone we love dies and won't be coming home again. 

Beam Me Up Scottie or Let the Parrots Free

Last night I watched a PBS special about rescuing abandoned parrots or parrots that people could not keep.  It was an hour long special and talked about poachers taking baby parrots from the nests and raising them to sell. Now instead of poaching they breed parrots.  There are hundreds if not thousands of parrots who now live in rescue places.

They went on to show how parrots and other birds are social and need to be with their own.  They find mates and bond.  Parrots alone in a cage get so anxious they start pulling out their own feathers.  This is like people who are in so much pain they cut themselves.

I got tears in my eyes watching this and especially when I saw a parrot raised as a baby being released and practicing flying.  Then it soared with another parrot and flew free.






This program deeply affected me, even more than I realized because I've often felt caged by fears and anxiety.  I have a feeling that I once knew how to fly but living on this planet with gravity holding me down, I forgot how.  I had a flying dream once and hope to have more.

I got into the shower and found myself sobbing, runny nose, snorting type of crying. It surprised me but it didn't stop for awhile. The crying wasn't about the birds so much but about feelings that came up for me.

I have had panic and anxiety most of my life which was diagnosed as Agoraphobia.  

I'm better now because of a lot of different therapies, especially Emotional Freedom, tapping, but I feel a lot of my life has looked like this..

What does it feel like to live a life of freedom and really fly? 


Would this make a difference?