Anxious But Let's Get it Done - Day 21

Since I'm fully vaccinated I'm catching up on things that I've put off since staying isolated from Covid.

Today is getting my teeth cleaned and seeing if I need a tooth pulled.   After a childhood filled with surgeries, doctor appointments, dentists and braces, I have every right to feel anxious. Sometimes I am more anxious than others.   Today I am anxious but not focusing on it except for writing a blog about it.  I am feeling bits of warm pulses of anxiety energy running through my body.  I allow myself to feel it instead of pushing it down.  I do some mental eft tapping, take some slow deep breathing and blow out the anxious energy. Thankfully I have more tools to use now than when I was a child.  Back then I just swallowed my fears and suffered a lot of stomach aches.  

This is how I feel about going to the dentist.

Going to the dentist

Rewards are important and I've been thinking what I will give myself.  I know I want to get a new phone, so that will be a possible reward.  Depending on today's outcome will decide if food will be a reward. 

I'm blogging every day in April with a wonderful, creative, caring group of over 300 bloggers on Effy's Blog-a-thon.

 http://effywild.com

 

Grocery Shopping at Home

 Years ago when I experienced agoraphobic at its strongest I dreaded grocery shopping.  But we needed food.  Hubby was working and I couldn't expect him to work and shop too.  So I'd force myself to go even though I never knew when I'd have a debilitating panic attack.   Forget standing in line!  Grocery shopping or any other shopping tired me out for days.  I wished I could buy groceries for a month and never have to step into the store for weeks.

Eventually with therapy and coping tools I learned I did get better, although I've never been one to enjoy going to malls and shops. 

Fast forward 55 years...  Hubby has been retired for many years and we grocery shop together.  I actually enjoy it now - or did until the Covid-19 pandemic of 2020 arrived.  We are up in years and have been advised to stay out of stores and stay home.   It's been nine months now.  For a while we shopped as early as possible after the store opened to avoid the crowds.  That's when they had special hours for older folks and those who's health has been compromised.   But the virus started spreading faster, more people were catching it and truthfully I didn't want to go anyplace. I'm not scared of dying but not of this virus.   So a friend, who had been shopping online for awhile, guided me how she does it.  At first the idea really didn't appeal to me because I like to see what I'm ordering. I didn't want someone else picking out my fresh fruits, meat and vegetables. Truth be told, I was really skeptical.

At first I tried a small pickup order after learning how to order online. That was the fun part ordering groceries on an app on my ipad.  We did the pick up and whoever did the shopping was very good.  The vegetables were nice and my order was just what I would have done myself.

After another pickup I discovered the store offered a 15 day trial for free delivery.   I read some posts by others who were not happy with their experiences, some local and others national so my skepticism spoke up again.  But some were really happy with it.

Surprise surprise, it was a wonderful experience!!!  I signed up for a year for free delivery at what I feel is a very reasonable price.  Now I'm hooked!  After we shopped we were both worn out for the rest of the day.  But with free delivery all we do is bring the groceries in, wipe them down and put them away.  I sit in my recliner and order our food and have it delivered.  What a joy.  I would have loved this 55 years ago.  After the pandemic is over I intend to continue to shop online and have our groceries delivered.  Sure I might go the store for some things like fresh cooked fried chicken. I'm really missing that.  

I just hope that being isolated for so long won't trigger more panic when we are safe to go back out.  If so, I do have more help than I did in the past.  

I belong to a wonderful Emotional Freedom Tapping group Thriving Now.   I've learned so much about emotional healing and freedom here.  I also use meditation.  The App Calm is good for calming with breathing and focusing on the now.   I belong to an agoraphobia group on Facebook where we help each other with understanding and not feeling so alone.  

Are you Potty Trained Yet?

 What if this world we're living in is "not even beyond the cosmic equivalent of potty training"?

Right now with the pandemic it sort of feels like it.  I mean look at the politicians and how they are blaming each other instead of using their status (I won't even say the word power) to solve this Covid-19 virus.   
Here it is five months since us older folks are told to stay home.   

People are saying masks don't work and even the president only wears his mask when he wants to.  He even claimed on Wednesday that catching the coronavirus was “a blessing from God”

I'm reading a book: Afterlife Adventures: Life After Death Stories/What Happens When We Die/Is There Proof?  by William Fergus Martin. He's the one I quoted from about potty training and he goes on to say, "Yet that takes nothing away from our potential and what we will eventually become."

I'm fascinated and when I see the news and all the political blaming ads I think, "Potty Training class".  

Yes I will vote but I'm going to stop allowing myself to get any more upset by the potty training classes and focus more on spreading love, angel blessings, joy and laughter. This does not mean I don't care because I do but I need to take care of myself now.  Too many aches, pains and stomach aches from watching potty training antics.  

So if you want a few laughs come on over to my FUN page. And take good care of you.  You have guardian angels around you who are waiting for you to ask them for help.  They love you and that's the start of another blog.